Admission Confirmed!

God has blessed me tremendously again today! Medyo maghanda na kayo ng mimiryendahin at iinumin while you read this sharing, hehe, kasi medyo mahaba na naman ito.

First of all, I got a response to my email to our parish priest saying that we might be leaving the parish this summer, and requesting for references for the boys as they apply for a Catholic school in Cambridge. Importante ang recommendation ng parish priest because it is the only way the school can verify that we are indeed practising Catholics, which would increase the chances of the boys' getting places. I got more than I asked for, because not only did Fr C promise to write reference letters for the boys, he also mentioned that he is friends with one of the priests (the parish administrator) in the Cambridge parish we will be moving to, the same parish which supports the Catholic school that we'll be applying to. As in, magkatabi ang school at ang church. Hopefully, Fr C's reference letters will help the boys.

Next, I got an email from Schlumberger Foundation inviting me to come to the Faculty for the Future Fellows European Conference in Paris this Sept/Oct--- with all travel and hotel expenses shouldered by the Foundation! Nagpaalam ako agad kay O and he was quick to say yes, kasi he wants me to embrace each opportunity that I am given, and he is also excited for me. He assured me that he and the boys will be fine while I'm gone. Hindi naman sila pwede sumama kasi for women only yung conference, and besides, the boys will be in school by that time... Wow, I'll be in Paris for a week just before term starts in Cambridge! And for free. WOW!

Last but not least, after so many emails and complications back and forth, and lots of prayers, moments of trusting quietly and asking the Lord to convince the Board of Graduate Studies that my one-year fellowship (with the possibility of two renewals) is enough evidence of funding for a three-year PhD, well finally, the Lord wielded His power and showed that for Him, nothing is impossible: I have just received confirmation of my admission as a Graduate Student in Cambridge, one of the best universities in the whole world, second only to Harvard! I feel both excited and nervous, because this is the biggest challenge I'll be facing thus far (aside from giving birth twice without medication hehehe).

Alam nyo, when I stop and think about it, everything was against my getting in from the very beginning:

-I don't have the equivalent of a UK bachelor's honours degree

-I don't have a completed master's degree

-I have been intellectually stagnant for 7 years!

-As far as I knew, I did not qualify for internal funding

But one by one, God showed our family how He purposely overturned every single obstacle that stood in the way:

-I was led to a very kind, compassionate and genuinely concerned PhD supervisor, Dr C, whom I have yet to meet in person! She lobbied for me when the BGS said my Philippine qualifications were insufficient.

-She encouraged me to apply for the Schlumberger fellowship, even if I was not strictly qualified for that either. She wrote a recommendation letter for me in support of my fellowship application, even if she had not yet met me, but just basing her letter on my past performance and future potential.

-She has already planned on how to support me as I ease back into the academe, explaining to me that she will put me in a research group so that I can have support and won't be left too much on my own in the first year.

-She used her influence to make sure the BGS processed my admission quickly, so that I can use my admission letter to secure a flat and apply for schools for the boys. She is such a great blessing, and I can't wait to be under her mentorship for the next three years.

-I was selected as a Fellow for a grant meant for women in emerging economies, even if I am no longer living in the Philippines! I see God's hand at work, and I cannot claim ANYTHING for myself, because I know that to have been chosen as one of 29 grantees out of 180 women who applied from all over the world, well, this is nothing short of a miracle.

In other words, my dear family and friends, may ginagawa talaga si Lord sa buhay naming mag-anak, and I can feel in the deepest part of me that there is something being done here which is bigger than just me or my lifelong dream of doing scientific research. He is forming us and positioning us. Feeling ko, we are only a small part of the bigger picture. For sure, God is doing something marvelous and ineffable, na hindi pa namin nakikita sa ngayon. So we will follow His lead and bloom where He chooses to plant our family.

Yon lang naman ang sharing ko for today :) Please praise the Lord with me and give Him thanks for all He is doing in us and for us.

Casting my Cares on the Lord

Uh-oh. I've run into a glitch in my Cambridge application, and yesterday I was emailing the BGS and my department and my PhD supervisor all the way till the end of office hours trying to iron it out. It seems that even just for my "CPGS only" course (a 1-year stint which serves as a pre-PhD or 1st year PhD), I am expected to give evidence of three years' funding. The way I understood it, since I was supposed to complete the CPGS successfully and THEN at the end of the 1st year be asked to re-apply, re-register for the 2nd year of the PhD, I would only need to furnish proof of funding for the first year. Which is what I did, using my financial undertaking and Award letter from Schlumberger. Now they are asking me to show proof of funding for three years.

The thing is, my Fellowship is awarded by Schlumberger on an annual basis, not as a three-year commitment. Yes, it is eligible for renewal up to a further two years, making it a total of three years altogether, but obviously, the renewal process is not automatic or by default. It is, of course, subject to my performance, how I assess myself and how my supervisor rates me. But it is also a given fact that, since Schlumberger's primary goal is to support PhD and post-doc students, the renewal of their PhD grants is almost expected. Otherwise, why would they support fellows only in the first year and abandon them later on in the middle of their studies, unless they really utterly spectacularly fail at accomplishing what's academically required? It wouldn't make sense, would it? So I am hoping and praying fervently that Cambridge will deem Schlumberger's grant renewal policy as sufficient evidence of available funding for three years. As far as I can tell, I seem to be the first and only Faculty for the Future Fellow in Cambridge, so the BGS isn't too familiar as yet with the way the grant is administered by Schlumberger. In other words, I'm breaking them in. Lucky me.

More to the point, I'd like to share how God has really consoled and assured me throughout this whole thing, from yesterday afternoon, all throughout the long night, and to this very moment. I reflected on the Liturgical readings for today on my favourite Mass readings site, and here's what I found there:

(Selected from James 4: 1-10) "You do not possess because you do not ask.
You ask but do not receive, because you ask wrongly... therefore, it says: God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble... So submit yourselves to God.
Resist the Devil, and he will flee from you.
Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you...
Humble yourselves before the Lord
and he will exalt you."

(Selected from Mk 9: 30-37) "Taking a child, he placed it in their midst,
and putting his arms around it, he said to them,
“Whoever receives one child such as this in my name, receives me;
and whoever receives me,
receives not me but the One who sent me.”

(From Ps 55) "Cast your cares upon the Lord, and He will support you."

I cling to these words of comfort and guidance now, loving Father, as I humble myself before You, knowing that everything comes from You, that all I need to do is ask and ask rightly, and that all I can ever boast about is the fact that I am a child of such an awesome and powerful God. So I cast all my cares upon You, Lord. Teach me to be like a child who trusts completely in her Father.

And by Your grace, I shall trust in You alone.

My Cambridge IELTS results

Happy news! Last May 3rd, I took my first IELTS test in Cambridge to fulfill the English language requirement of my PhD admission offer.

Well, I got my IELTS test results just this morning: my Overall Band Score is 9.0! IELTS test scores range from 0 to 9, and looking at the recent stats, I think almost no one gets such high scores, so I'm really, really lucky. I got 9.0 in Listening, 9.0 in Reading, 8.0 in Writing & 9.0 in Speaking. It's ironic because out of all my English skills, I am usually more confident about writing than, say, speaking, so this is a big confidence booster for me. I think my writing score was affected by the fact that, like many of you, my creative thought output is usually typed, not written longhand as in the hour-long test, and the serious finger-cramping in the middle of the essays probably had something to do with it, as well. But I am absolutely THRILLED with my writing score and I'm definitely taking it, no doubt about that! And yes, as the British would say, I am totally, perfectly chuffed to bits with my Overall Band Score and I AM CERTAINLY NOT COMPLAINING!!! Woohoo! Come and praise the Lord with me!

Yay! Now all my admission conditions are fulfilled! Earlier on, I had posted all my original academic transcripts to the Board of Graduate Studies, and I had also sent my Financial Undertaking Form, my official Award letter from Schlumberger Foundation and other financial documents. My proposed budget for my fellowship had also earlier been approved by Schlumberger, which is a tremendous blessing! Plus, I've already received an Offer of college membership, and my boys and I were even able to pay a visit to the College on the day of my IELTS test.

Now all that remains is to wait for the confirmation letter from Cambridge. I actually worked up the nerve to ask my PhD supervisor for any help she can give to possibly speed things up a bit with the Board of Graduate Studies, since I need that letter pronto to secure a tenancy agreement for our preferred family flat, which is then needed to apply for September school places for the boys. All of the school places for Reception Year have already been fully allocated last month, so E will need quite a lot of your prayers so he can get into the only Catholic school in the Cambridge city centre. I pray that somehow, miraculously, someone will turn down their offer and that place will then be given to E. Prayers needed please, for both B and E! I know that the Lord has great things in store for our boys.

And lots of prayers, too, for O's jobsearch. Please ask for grace for opportunities to open for him, for wisdom to craft his CV in the right way for each company, for him to be shortlisted, interviewed, offered a great job in or near Cambridge, and please pray for time and energy to do all this on top of all we normally do.

It has been quite an exciting journey so far, so many fantastic things have happened. Everything good, good stress, but stress nonetheless. I think I should try to learn some stretching exercises or pilates to de-stress myself. My muscles are so stiff, even when I'm lying down! I need to relax, seriously. The Lord is our Shepherd, indeed, and there is nothing we shall want!

Thanks again to all who have given their prayers and support, and I promise to keep you updated!